The Interpretation of Quantum Mechanics

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[Part of: Poetica Philosophica.]

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The many worlds interpretation claims
There's many yous to take the blames.
Should an electron pass on through a slit
And determine which of two acts
You'll do—miraculously, you will split,
and see a multitude of facts.

It's the wavefunction, Bohmians assert, 
That branches every time you flirt
While all the atoms making up your face
Produce precise and awkward smiles.
Small comfort to inhabit just one place
If she can see right through your wiles.

Spontaneous collapse, some others say,
Is nature's way to save the day.
Just when the cat's about to superpose
A choice is made, it's life or death 
       And then
The animal's there, wiggling its nose
And maybe breathing its last breath.

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